This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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