batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
