so explain again why im purple
no
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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