idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
