Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Help. Why am I so naked?
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