so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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