he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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