Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize