Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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