You're so nebulous sometimes
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
