I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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