More tranny stories later!
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
