Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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