Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
