i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
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