Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
