Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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