I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Randomize
