Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I'm sobbing to NWA
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.