goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
