he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
We are two peas in an std pod
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
