we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
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