HIV tests are more positive than that guy
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
