it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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