i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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