i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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