You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
