apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
