Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.

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  (847): I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto. http://tfl.nu/j5p7
  Replies (56) Good night (3764) Bad night (1386)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet

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  (708): he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet http://tfl.nu/enn5
  Replies (40) Good night (6542) Bad night (784)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,

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  (973): I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry, http://tfl.nu/9gek
  Replies (28) Good night (6282) Bad night (924)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class

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  (609): Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class http://tfl.nu/440m
  Replies (29) Good night (10307) Bad night (1237)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.

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  (267): she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon. http://tfl.nu/y6s2
  Replies (11) Good night (3940) Bad night (1529)
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  (209): View more from California

  Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.

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  (209): Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way. http://tfl.nu/s3aa
  Replies (5) Good night (1871) Bad night (573)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.

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  (920): I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background. http://tfl.nu/kwpk
  Replies (6) Good night (1208) Bad night (522)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter

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  (614): Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter http://tfl.nu/3fce
  Replies (6) Good night (1876) Bad night (787)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.

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  (816): Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland. http://tfl.nu/1rj2
  Replies (3) Good night (1967) Bad night (583)
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  (716): View more from New York

  took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink

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  (716): took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink http://tfl.nu/qhkh
  Replies (4) Good night (662) Bad night (1190)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...

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  (302): Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week... http://tfl.nu/cclg
  Replies (3) Good night (572) Bad night (902)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??

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  (610): So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night?? http://tfl.nu/qtcd
  Replies (2) Good night (1021) Bad night (445)
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  (951): View more from California

  It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.

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  (951): It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set. http://tfl.nu/pz4i
  Replies (2) Good night (461) Bad night (408)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.

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  (407): Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class. http://tfl.nu/mt7c
  Replies (0) Good night (605) Bad night (270)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.

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  (303): He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog. http://tfl.nu/knm0
  Replies (0) Good night (273) Bad night (442)

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