Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
