To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
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i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
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Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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