I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
You're like the curious george of whores
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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