He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I will be naked everywhere
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
