I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
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