so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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