Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
you never un-have a 4some
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize
