hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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