3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
its not stalking. its research.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Randomize