what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
