yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
dude i'm inner monologue high
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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