What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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