i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I just sucked dick on a ferry
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
