But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
