just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
