Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
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