dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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