i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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