I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
