I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I forgot how hot balto sounded
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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