he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
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