ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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